Morning thoughts

Taking a break from talking about the Hunter.
Back to me now. I know oh brother.

Whenever I don’t think about it, it never goes away for long.
Maybe the method I’m doing is wrong.
I go to work and do my best.
I over do it and then go home to rest.

Those words”Get over it”, or “you just stay in the past”
You think I want this to last ?
No I do not. It’s not intentional.
Do you have to know me at all?

Yes for the past few weeks I’ve being doing a lot of writing.
My alternative to fighting.
The encouragement I get isn’t encouraging really.
Getting over it or anything isn’t ever easy.

I stay in the past at times because some good times are there.
It’s to remember what good I did do and where.
What I’ve gone through for the last two months was hard.
My mind wandered very far.
Far away from my body and descended into the burning abyss.
Where lies my fears, doubts, regrets  and other shit.

It’s calls to me to stay in that hole.
After all nobody would know.
Especially when people don’t really ask about you.
It’s not cool.
What can you do ?

It is what it is.
I know what it is that I did.
Sometimes I do wish instead.
That I wish I could get out of my head
Not think about my fuck-ups so much.
 some patience and faith. Not so much luck.
Maybe I turn into a better me.
Who knows what will tomorrow bring.